I posted this question on ServerFault Stack exchange before this and got told it was off-topic there too and was told to post it on the Software Recommendations stack exchange. Honestly, if this doesn't fit either of these stack exchanges then I don't know which one it belongs too.
I'm not sure why the kids over at ServerFault SE told you to post it here, because it's definitely off-topic here, as it's not seeking a software recommendation.
It's almost a fit for Information Security SE, but it's more of a privacy issue than a security issue, so it might get closed there too. (You can always try and see what happens.)
There isn't currently a great fit anywhere on SE for your question as far as I know. Superuser is probably the best fit, but you'll probably just get told to contact Tailscale, which is obviously not going to help you much. It won't hurt to try asking there though.
I'm real sorry, but for better or worse, some questions don't really fit anywhere on the SE network.
I do hope you find the answer to your question somehow.